Benjamin Therapy

I realize that it has been a long time since I have given any updates on Benjamin.  Now I understand why there are only a handful of photos of myself as a baby.  I used to think it was just favoritism for the older children, but now I understand that it really only means that parents have less time for snapping pictures.  I love my little guy so much.  My heart seems to want to burst with fullness when I look at him.  He owns me!

At Benjamin's 4 month check up, he couldn't hold us his big noggin at all.  His neck and head were almost as floppy as the day he was born.  But  I wasn't worried because I had forgotten EVERYTHING FROM THE FIRST TIME AROUND. Our pediatrician, however, was worried about low muscle tone and so she referred us to an early intervention center for an evaluation on Benjamin's motor skills.

I almost didn't make the appointment.  In my eyes, Benjamin was perfect, perfect, perfect.  But a month later, I finally made the appointment for a month after that.  It was just going to be an evaluation.  He would qualify for services if he fell in the bottom 25% of ability in any given area.

The evaluation consisted of playing with Benjamin for 2 hours.  Hey, I can handle that anytime.  But I started to see that Benjamin didn't readily grab for any object.  He couldn't lift his head up off the ground much or move from side to side.  During the few times that he did reach for something, his movements were very slow and deliberate-- as if they took great concentration.  Not that a 6 month old is ready to drive a car or anything, but even I could see that Benjamin seemed to have trouble with his motor skills.

After the evaluation, the two therapists deliberated for a half hour while Benjamin slept (he had worked hard!).  They came back into the evaluation room and told me that although Benjamin was the most beautiful baby in the world, and had the best personality, and talents beyond the human imagination, and unlimited potential (okay, so those are my words), that he did qualify for intervention services

What that meant was that once a week, a therapist would come to our house and work with us and Benjamin at improving Benjamin's motor skills and coordination.  The therapist would train us on exercises to do with Benjamin to strengthen him so that he could perform normal baby feats like rolling over or sitting up on his own.

So in January we started these therapy sessions and they have been great!  I love our therapist and Benjamin just loves all the attention he gets.  WE clap and applaud and praise him for every effort.  And he has improved so much.   I don't know how long we will need these services, but they are worth it for us-- because Benjamin does have unlimited potential and talents beyond the human imagination!  And he also has a huge head!  I would struggle too if I had to hold up that thing.  He must think very complex thoughts.

At first when we factored in the cost of his therapy, we resigned ourselves to the fact that we would not be able to add to our savings for awhile.  We didn't have a lot of excess funds to begin with.  But our therapist encouraged us to apply for financial aid through the program and we got accepted!  One of many tender mercies.

I know it is nothing like raising a disabled child or a child with severe delays.  I know that my experience with Benjamin's therapy is tiny in comparison to the many mothers and fathers who deal with severe physical or mental challenges.  But I used to be so scared of the what if....."what if my child has a disability?"  I was scared that I wouldn't be able to handle the stress and that it would be too hard.  Now, in a very small way, I understand that those fears pale in comparison to the fierce love that says "I will do ANYTHING for my child."